Daddy's Story (Part 3 - Labour)

The main issue as we went forward was that she was very tired. So they gave here a mild sedative that would help her sleep for a couple of hours. The contractions still woke her up but as soon as they were done she slept. Throughout this time I was again largely sidelined. When the contractions came she wanted her aunt's back rubs. Anything I did was 'irritating'. It was a pretty lonely couple of hours. Watching her aunt and my MIL do the job that was supposed to be mine.

"Update? Nothing to report. They're going 2 check her progress @ 8pm" 6:16 PM Jun 6th from txt

At this point i really should mention out birthing team. Andrea was our midwife, a blessing since she was the one we've seen most throughout the pregnancy. Sharon was comfortable with her and she really understood Sharon. She was assisted by Lexie, an RN and a birthing assisstant. Lexie was a real Godsend. She truly understood Sharon and was the one person who was able to get her to focus through her contractions. She really was amazing. Then there was Paula, trainee birthing assistant who was a huge help too. What I'm trying to say is that the team at the Brooklyn Birthing center were really wonderful throughout. It was Paula who, when my wife was being particularly harsh to me reassured me that it was normal, she'd been the same way with her husband when she was in labour and that it wouldn't last.

So we had decided to check progress at 8pm. Because of the risk of infection they couldn't do too many internal exams so there was a degree of eagerness as we waited to see how we were doing

"Update; STILL ONLY 5cm! 4 1/2 hours and nothing to show for it. talk about demoralising." 7:49 PM Jun 6th from txt

That was a kick in the gut. after 4 1/2 hours we'd made no progress. I really think that news undid any benefit we may have gained from the sleep. From this point on she was pretty much convinced that it was all for nothing and she couldn't do it. The decision was made that if, in 3 hours there was still no more progress we'd transfer to Maimonides hospital. With her water broken and the risk of infection time was an issue. SO for the next 3 hours she'd be walking and moving around as much as possible in the hope we'd make progress. This was where Lexie was really awesome, without her I don't think we'd have made it. She was able to work well with Sharon to help her work throught the contractions. but we were working against exhaustion and the fact that she was convinced she was making no progress. it was a tough couple of hours

"Tired and frustrated. She s in pain, exhausted, drained n miserable. And i can t do anything to help." 9:19 PM Jun 6th from txt

At least, by this point she was allowing me to help her through this but she was so tired at this point she was pretty much at the end of her strength. We reached the point around this time when it looked like we were done trying to do this naturally at the birthing center. She had lain down for a couple of minutes and now refused to get up and try any more. We tried to persuade her to go 1 more hour and we'd do a progress check but she wasn't hearing any of it. Andrea actually reached the ppint of decision. "that's it, we're done here" funnily enough it was NYCs potholes that decided the issue, when Sharon asked if we'd call an ambulance and was told that we'd have to drive since it wasn't an emergency she suddenly found new resolve. She'd found the car so horribly uncomfortable she didn't want to face it again (either that or she thought my driving was REALLY bad!). so she agreed to try for 1 more hour.

So it was that at 10:15pm Andrea did an exam and...

"Progress!! 8-9cm dilated!" 10:16 PM Jun 6th from txt

Well that was great news! The mood changed here, and if she hadn't been so very exhausted by now I think we'd have been in very good shape for the next phase.

the last cm was stubborn, Sharon was tired and really wanted to push

"Almost completely dilated. Not long now" 10:46 PM Jun 6th from txt

There was some light hearted banter around this time as to whether he'd be a Saturday or Sunday baby.

to be continued...